Monday, February 15, 2010

Change of Heart

I'm not really a person that jumps on board just any "bandwagon" that rolls our way. I'm a skeptic by nature and on top of that I'm terribly stubborn. On that note, I have admittedly been skeptical of home school, until recently.

On a whim...late one night, while Aaron was away in Boston I stumbled across a book on the internet titled.."The Well Trained Mind, A Guide to Classical Education at Home." A few clicks later and I (actually surprising myself) ordered the hardbound third edition.

I truly believe that the Spirit of the Lord was leading me that night.

Last week was one of the hardest I have gone though as a wife and a mom. The realities of our upcoming move are sinking in fast and I feel a bit overwhelmed at times. I was scheduled to fly out to Boston this past Wednesday, but because of a huge snowstorm had to change the flight at the last minute and leave early Tuesday morning. On top of that I had to fit in a trip to the dr. for myself where I found out that I had pneumonia...just an hour before the pharmacy closed. Thankfully I got all the meds needed (barely)...rush home (thanks mom) Abigail with her report, make dinner, finish laundry, hold my babies, tuck them in, make a million lists for Poppa & Momma, pack at some point..and crash for 2 hours.

I found myself on the plane just before the sun is up and drop into my seat. My mind was spinning...stomach churning. Hunger...I thought. It will pass. just got worse and worse. "Please Lord, I don't want to throw up on this plane." It was still so quiet as sleepy passengers filed in. I'm in the front row..(first class thanks to Mitek). I fight the urge with everything in me, but to no avail. At least I made it to the dinky bathroom. Unfortunately everyone and their brother could hear engines to at least cover up the catastrophe. Note to self: Do not take very strong anti-biotics on an empty stomach.

The hunt for a house was even more discouraging. I don't want to sound ungrateful...I truly am overwhelmed with God's graces on us. We walked thorough a dozen houses with everything from blue toilets to expansive spaces without a speck of character. It was hard to imagine our family in those rooms...if you know what I mean. The only way I can explain it is that we found a lot of houses but not a home. Still...I know that it will work His perfect time.

In spite of not finding a house to call home we did find a very loving fellowship in Foxboro. Finding a church has been the most important thing to us, and both Aaron and I felt at home the moment we walked into Church of Emmanuel. After a long week filled with more downs than ups this came as the most welcome surprise. We worshipped with our brothers and sisters in Christ, hands lifted high in praise to our Mighty God.

Back to "The Well Trained Mind". Aaron had to work while I was there, which gave me a lot of un-interrrupted quiet time. I felt like the Lord desired my full attention. He spoke to me though His word, refreshed my heart with His Spirit and revealed to me His vision for our children. I was being called to be their teacher. My fears of failure and inadequacy paled in comparison to the call. He so clearly revealed to me His will that I had no other choice but to obey.

I was apprehensive to talk to Aaron about what the Lord had spoken to my heart. We have both been on the same page about homeschool in the past (skeptical) not to mention we are moving into an area with some of the best public schools in the country. I whispered a prayer to Jesus, that He would prepare Aaron's heart too.

My enthusiasm must have been contagious, because after sharing with him all that the Lord had revealed to me, he willingly agreed. After reading just a few chapters of "The Well Trained Mind" he was moved to lead in home educating our children and just as inspired as I had been.

The future is unclear. There will be days of doubt. But God is rich in mercy and we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:4 & 10)


  1. Jen, I got teary eyed reading this.... for I know where it was going. I have had the Lord tug on my heart the VERY same way. Even tried to cover it up by "trying" out school. As you walk the road ahead, know this sister in Christ will be praying for you! Homeschooling presents itself with many many doubts, but the time, joy, and relationship you build with your children will be amazing. Not to mention, they see more of Mommy's need for Jesus herself. In all things whether homeschool mom or not we need the grace of God daily! It will take time just figuring out "how" you desire to homeschool. Classical education is a great start! Anyways... thanks for being transparent. Love your blog! Love you! I am hear for you if you need anything.

  2. Thank you so much dear friend. Your words mean so much more to me than you'll ever know. Thank you for your encouragement and prayers. Please keep in touch...I'm sure that I will be coming your way with more than a few questions. Love you always.

  3. Well, as a former public school teacher married to a public school teacher, I can tell you where we stood before we had children. No way, no how would we ever homeschool! Sawyer starts Kindergarten next year and Jubilee starts preschool...their teacher is Mommy (and Daddy)! One curriculum that I am interested in is Tapestry of Grace, it is a Classical approach, just to give you a peek into one of bazillion options! I am excited for you and you will be a fabulous homeschooling mom!


  4. As a person who worked/works in the public schools I actually agree with Emily! I plan on homeschooling my kids even if we aren't living in a foreign country. It's really scary how many kids are in the classrooms these days, there's just no way for the teacher to get to all of them. There is also a lot of great curriculum out there these days for you to use! It's really not that hard as long as you set a schedule, check to see what the kids need to learn, and figure out social stuff for the kids to do. You'll be awesome Jen! You can do it! Having the support of your husband is definitely a plus too! :)

    There's a place you can check out called I think the Learning Palace. It has a lot of stuff in it. You can also check online too.

  5. Jen you are so inspiring I too have been feeling the Lord calling me to this same place and reading your words helps me to not feel so nervous about the future.

  6. Wow...all of your words mean so much more than you can imagine! I'm just the most blessed woman to have friends like you.